Jules van der Linden
Chalk pastels on paper
“You will never touch me again.”
! TW: sexual abuse, trauma
“EMDR therapy has been incredibly intense, but yesterday I finally had a breakthrough. It took me about 6 weeks to finally access the memory of my sexual abuse without immediately having a panic attack, but we got there.
I needed to affirm for myself that my abuser no longer has any control over me. The wounds have to drain out before they can heal. I needed to really feel what happened to me. That’s why I got inspired and picked up my art supplies again.
During this therapy journey, I follow my dopamine and just do what my brain tells me will bring healing.
Making this piece has been really affirming and consoling to me.
As for the use of color: the yellow and orange tones symbolise my girlfriend, who has been there for me through my healing and always makes me feel safe. This safety and stability is what I need to heal properly. Orange and pink together make the lesbian flag, which symbolises how safe and valid I feel in my identity. The blue tones symbolise my abuser, because the memory of his hands on me is slowly fading into the background, just like his filth is slowly leaving my body like poison from a wound.”
Jules is a queer artist from Belgium. Follow their work on Instagram: @jules.rassic.park