THE COVER STORY

BY NIKA PAVOT

#EDITORIAL

FEATURE

“Queer love reconfigures the way you move through the world when, at last, you are touched softly, gently and with such tenderness”

Deidre’s social media reads like a beau­ti­ful love let­ter to les­bian­ism, and their per­son­al work reflects their event­ful life—from a case of sex­u­al vio­lence in Deidre’s child­hood to mar­ry­ing their pla­ton­ic part­ner. Fer­rars & Fields talks to Dei­dre about queer love and its part in the process of heal­ing from sex­u­al trauma.

BY MERCY FERRARS W/ DEIDRE OLSEN

FEATURE

Die (Un-)Ordnung der Bilder

Wir sehen, was wir sehen sollen. Seit­dem das Orig­i­nal eines Kunst­werks beliebig repro­duzier­bar ist, wis­sen wir nicht mehr, was wir sehen. Manch­mal sehen wir eine Frau. Und meis­tens sehen wir eine Frau, die gese­hen wird. Und das ist nicht dasselbe.

BY CLARA BERLICH

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EDITOR’S DIGEST

Crumpled brown paper textured background

2022 Wrapped: Der Fer­rars & Fields Jahresrückblick.

2008 entwirft Bri­an Kel­ly sein erstes Tat­too Flash-Set und bringt immer neue Ideen zu Papi­er bis schließlich ein Buch mit den Zeich­nun­gen der let­zten Jahre entste­ht: The Cut-Ups: Tat­too Flash from the Third Mind (2022, Schif­fer Pub­lish­ing). In The Cut-Ups bietet Bri­an Ein­blicke in die schöpferischen Tech­niken, die sein­er Kun­st zu Grunde liegen, faszinierend nicht zulet­zt, weil sich sein Kun­sthandw­erk unter anderem der Lit­er­atur bedient.

FEATURE

The Entropic Lighter

“Now, the fire can come back at any time, and it will not be as trau­ma­tiz­ing as it was before; flames will be noth­ing but old lovers wel­comed back into a house haunt­ed by their absence. His ther­a­pist her­self said it: mean­ing can be found in chaos. It is, after all, nicer to see the glass half-emp­ty than to admit that there is no glass anymore.”

BY HUGO SCHEUBEL

TRENDING

The Entropic Lighter

“Now, the fire can come back at any time, and it will not be as trau­ma­tiz­ing as it was before; flames will be noth­ing but old lovers wel­comed back into a house haunt­ed by their absence. His ther­a­pist her­self said it: mean­ing can be found in chaos. It is, after all, nicer to see the glass half-emp­ty than to admit that there is no glass anymore.”

Warum eigentlich Pride? — Von der tödlichsten aller Todsünden

“Wenn wir als queere Men­schen ohne­hin schon von der Kirche und einem erhe­blichen Teil der Gesellschaft als Sünder*innen betra­chtet wer­den, kön­nen wir genau­so gut das Nar­ra­tiv übernehmen und in ein­er selb­ster­mächti­gen­den Weise umgestal­ten. Wir wis­sen schließlich wie befreiend es ist, sich über die erlernte Scham zu erheben und zu sündi­gen. Warum uns dann nicht gle­ich der tödlich­sten aller Tod­sün­den hingeben und im Stillen sowie in aller Öffentlichkeit unsere eigene Lobpreisung verkünden?”

FEATURE

BY MERCY FERRARS

FICTION & POETRY

A M N E S I A IV—VI

I see flash­es of her face in front of me, big, daz­ing green eyes and skin cov­ered in debris of pain. “I see only dark­ness, dis­placed in me instead of the night.” She’s my God. She knows of our begin­nings and our aber­ra­tion. She killed her­self so I could live. I might as well try.

Zusammengelegte Kleidung

“Diese Zeit­en machen mir Angst. Weil sie unerr­e­ich­bar scheinen. Weil meine Zeit­en in alle Rich­tun­gen zer­fließen. Ich ver­suche mich wieder einzuord­nen ins Sys­tem. Ins Leben.”

The Entropic Lighter

“Now, the fire can come back at any time, and it will not be as trau­ma­tiz­ing as it was before; flames will be noth­ing but old lovers wel­comed back into a house haunt­ed by their absence. His ther­a­pist her­self said it: mean­ing can be found in chaos. It is, after all, nicer to see the glass half-emp­ty than to admit that there is no glass anymore.”

STORIES NEED PERSPECTIVES NEED MARGINALIZED VOICES NEED FUNDS.

We publish on the whole spectrum of what it means to be a fully fleshed out human being. Our essays, research, vulnerability and stories discuss queerness, feminism, anti-racism, disability and mental health as well as art, literature, film and media, featuring an exclusive digital exhibition. We make ourselves heard like thunder in a world overrun by battle, and we always seek to amplify the voices of others.

We believe it matters that our work reaches everyone with access to the internet, regardless of their financial situation. We write to change the world, but we depend on donations to pay our annual website plan.

If you choose to support us, you will be listed as a sponsor for 2023. 

THE COVER STORY

BY NIKA PAVOT

#EDITORIAL

FEATURE

“Queer love reconfigures the way you move through the world when, at last, you are touched softly, gently and with such tenderness”

Deidre’s social media reads like a beau­ti­ful love let­ter to les­bian­ism, and their per­son­al work reflects their event­ful life—from a case of sex­u­al vio­lence in Deidre’s child­hood to mar­ry­ing their pla­ton­ic part­ner. Fer­rars & Fields talks to Dei­dre about queer love and its part in the process of heal­ing from sex­u­al trauma.

BY MERCY FERRARS W/ DEIDRE OLSEN

#PRIDE

EDITOR’S DIGEST //

2022 Wrapped

2022 Wrapped: Der Fer­rars & Fields Jahresrückblick. 

SEND IN YOUR SUBMISSIONS //

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TRENDING //

The Entropic Lighter

“Now, the fire can come back at any time, and it will not be as trau­ma­tiz­ing as it was before; flames will be noth­ing but old lovers wel­comed back into …

FEATURE

Die (Un-)Ordnung der Bilder

Wir sehen, was wir sehen sollen. Seit­dem das Orig­i­nal eines Kunst­werks beliebig repro­duzier­bar ist, wis­sen wir nicht mehr, was wir sehen. Manch­mal sehen wir eine Frau. Und meis­tens sehen wir eine Frau, die gese­hen wird. Und das ist nicht dasselbe.

VON CLARA BERLICH

#ART

FEATURE

VON MERCY FERRARS

#ART

FEATURE

The Entropic Lighter

“Now, the fire can come back at any time, and it will not be as trau­ma­tiz­ing as it was before; flames will be noth­ing but old lovers wel­comed back into a house haunt­ed by their absence. His ther­a­pist her­self said it: mean­ing can be found in chaos. It is, after all, nicer to see the glass half-emp­ty than to admit that there is no glass anymore.”

BY HUGO SCHEUBEL

#FICTION

STORIES NEED PERSPECTIVES NEED MARGINALIZED VOICES NEED FUNDS.

We publish on the whole spectrum of what it means to be a fully fleshed out human being. Our essays, research, vulnerability and stories discuss queerness, feminism, anti-racism, disability and mental health as well as art, literature, film and media, featuring an exclusive digital exhibition. We make ourselves heard like thunder in a world overrun by battle, and we always seek to amplify the voices of others.

We believe it matters that out work reaches anyone with access to the internet, regardless of their financial situation and whether they can afford education. We write to change the world, but we depend on donations to pay for our annual website plan.

If you choose to support us, you will be listed as a sponsor for 2023.

THANK YOU!